Chemo Honeymoon?

Last week, after chemotherapy #1, and a bunch of medications to help me tolerate the symptoms of chemotherapy, I felt as if I was on a bit of a honeymoon from the symptoms I'd already been having!  I went out a few times,  had a better appetite and improved energy.  The best I've felt since February! I'm so grateful! 

Today was chemo #2.  I was told that my Neutrophils (cells that help fight infections) were going down too quickly.  I'll have to go in a couple of times this weeks for shots to help counteract this and will have to pay closer attention to the risk of catching "cooties" ... even being around recently vaccinated people.  But, so far, I feel about the same as last week and are hoping for another week of walking on the beach with Mr. Chemo. 

For the Nerds among you who have asked me about the "current staging" of my Intrahepatic Bile Duct Cancer.  It sounds like the name of various Droids in Star Wars:  cT1b,  cN0, cM0.  

  • cT1b means it is a single Tumor, greater than 5 cm in diameter. (Mine is still 7-8 cm or around 3 inches) and it has not grown into nearby blood vessels
  • cN0 means it has not spread to lymph nodes
  • cM0 means it has not spread to distant sites

Knowing that the true colors of Chemo are yet to be revealed causes me to expose my underbelly to everyone who happens to read this.

  • I tend to expect and prepare for the worst. 
  • I'm a wimp but want to appear strong.  
  • I don't like being "married" to Mr. Chemotherapy one single bit.  It was an arranged marriage. 

There is nothing quite like the words of Jesus to reveal my weakness.  He taught His 12 friends (Matthew 6: 31-34) in the Sermon on the Mount,

"So don't worry about these things, saying, 'What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear? These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs.  
Seek the Kingdom of the God above all else, and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need. So don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today."  

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